“Those” Preacher’s Kids

I just read a blog about preacher’s kids (PKs). It naturally caught my attention because I have been on church staff somewhere for the most part since 1996. I was in it before I ever had a wife or children. My ex-wife was a PK, and my children became that. Right now, they are getting a reprieve since I have not been on staff at a church since September of last year. Nevertheless, it still hits a nerve with me.

Not all PKs are the same. Not all are scarred by ministry wounds. Some escape fairly unscathed, while others get hit pretty hard. Why do some PKs not turn out “the way they are supposed to”?

Easy answer – they played with the deacons’ kids. Just kidding…a little! 

Church members often expect more from the PKs than they do their own children or themselves. This is unbiblical! God holds us all to a standard of righteousness, so put that old bony finger away unless you plan on turning it toward yourself.

Pastors have so many demands on them that they don’t have adequate time with family. Churches have come up with some of the craziest busy work for pastors to justify paying them. I have a feeling that’s where the idea of the committee on committees derived. Most of the meetings are pointless and ritualistic. I can’t tell you how many meetings I have attended that have been as productive as watching paint dry. I laugh at people who whine about churches being run like a business but don’t mind serving on a committee. Moving to the next paragraph 😀

PKs see how mean “Christian” people are to their fathers that they don’t want a part of Christianity. One of my children confessed to me after I resigned the pastorate that he overheard people talking badly about me constantly, saying I “ruled with an iron hand”. There will be a day of judgment for this unfair criticism. Say what you will about me, but leave my kids out of it!

I thank God for those who loved my children just the way they are. Not everyone in church is bad. We are all sinners. But we need to get out of this ancient mentality of putting pastors and their families on a separate island from the rest of the people. I purposely try not to let people know that I’m an ordained minister because I get sick of people acting differently around me. Be yourself. I have my problems too. My kids are just as “normal” as I am. They’re opinionated, emotional, argumentative, and the list goes on. Remember that the next time you prepare to have roast preacher or roast preacher’s family after Sunday morning worship. And I’ll still be here to listen when your kids turn out like a PK and you need someone to talk to.

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5 thoughts on ““Those” Preacher’s Kids

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  1. Another thing, which you touched a little on, is that some people have this dumb idea that the PK’s should be just as holy in their eyes as they hold their pastors. This puts so much pressure on the kid…not to mention their pastor.

  2. I can understand your argument completely. As a Catholic I know that our priests are capable of sin as well. They are not only ordained, as a conduit of Christ, to hear confessions, but have their own heard as well.

    Those who are ordained to preach are not perfect; for no man or woman is. Yet they can lead us to perfection, through the guidance of the Holy Spirit, in the exchange of our wills for the will of Christ.
    -Alan

  3. You are very direct and I like that. If we had more honesty with people and their misconceptions, maybe they would consider really looking at people the way God did, we have all fallen short. Why else would Jesus have died?

  4. Excellent post, again! 😀 We raised four “pks” – and they all love Jesus. As a pastor’s wife I purposely encouraged my children to be themselves (which is what all pastors should do) – it was a battle, as you know.
    I am so proud of my children. And my husband for letting them grow up in the way they should go.
    Good, good words in this post.

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