Divorce Doesn’t Mean the End of Your Life

Matthew Winters (Honest Thoughts from a Pastor)

When I knew divorce for me was imminent, I believed what I was trained – divorce means you’re done. Fortunately, I had some godly counselors who let me know otherwise. So I told God, “I will proceed to obey Your call upon my life. If You don’t want to use me, I pray You will stop me. In Jesus’ name, Amen.” He’s still using me. But I don’t want to focus on my story today. I want to focus on the stories of a few others of whom you may or may not be familiar.

One is a man named Ray Jones. He was a minister of music in Texas when he came home to a goodbye note from his wife. She no longer wanted to be married to a man in ministry. His church fired him, and he saw no foreseeable future in ministry. A pastor who had just started a church called Community Bible Church in San Antonio (averaging about 40 at that time) pursued Ray about leading worship. Today, Ray is leading a dynamic music ministry with several hundred musicians and a leader in modern worship. He met a lady whom he married, and they have a son together who writes music for their ministry.

Another man is Charles Stanley. His wife of many years left in the mid 1990s. Many Southern Baptists thought he should resign as pastor of First Baptist in Atlanta, Georgia and fade into the sunset. Over 20 years later, God is still using him.

A third is John Osteen. He has been with the Lord since 1999, but he was the founder of Lakewood Church which is now led by his son, Joel Osteen. His divorce took place in the 1950s when it was even more taboo. God gave him his precious wife, Dodie, who served faithfully by his side to reach the world for Christ until John’s passing.

God will use whomever He chooses however He chooses. I have often said that if God can make a donkey talk in the book of Numbers, He can still use them today. I feel like I identify with the donkey at times. Divorce does not mean you’re done. It just means that you are a broken vessel that God will put back together and use as a testimony of His Restoring power.

26 thoughts on “Divorce Doesn’t Mean the End of Your Life”

  1. Important point. The pressure for people in ministry to make their marriage work is through guilt, shame and condemnation. Grace is the best motivator and the better bridge to Hope, which is what we are trying to be vessels of.

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  3. We always must remember that Jesus did not come to condemn. Whenever we hear or feel condemnation, it is from the enemy, not God. God is mercy and grace, truth and righteousness, longsuffering and gentle. he never condemns!

    Be blessed

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  5. Reblogged this on gaillovesgod and commented:
    Pastor Matthew Winters (aka The Comeback Pastor) wrote this much needed article. Unfortunately, I too, have several friends and family serving in ministry who have unexpectedly found themselves divorced. Even more disheartening is that the majority of them have been women of God, serving in church, suddenly deciding to leave their husband, their children, their church (some leaving church altogether), and their ministries. Their husbands are left heartbroken, branded for being divorced (among believers and nonbelievers), have the burden of trying to explain to their children in a godly and loving manner why their mother no longer wants to live with them (some no longer having contact), and given the burden to play mom and dad financially, mentally, physically, spiritually all while so broken and often fighting a deep depression. I pray for our broken brothers and sisters, and praise God that He knows all, and is ever present, a healer, and a God that KNOWS sometimes our pain causes us to be hurt, bitter, to lash out, and to question everything we know about Him. He WANTS us to come to Him with ALL of our hurts, doubts, and yes even anger. Please join me, as you read, in praying for all those who are suffering from abandonment, separation, and divorce. “May you, dear God, be their guide, their comfort, their provision, their mercy, their grace, and their renewed hoped. Help them to keep trusting you, even if it means having no idea how you will work things out… the purest form of faith! In your Son’s Holy name we pray, the One who truly knows the deep scars of abandonment, rejection, and betrayal. Amen.

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  9. Pingback: Divorce Doesn’t Mean the End of Your Life | Between Me and God

  14. Divorce is a tough thing, Matthew. Been there. That was before I was a believer, but I know some folks look at a person a bit sideways on occasion. I’ve never been called to preach, so can’t really talk to that.

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